Hey, its me, kwanzaa gecko. no, not THAT one, I'm not in a boy band and I'm not on TV, so you probably won't listen to Me, but I have an important message for you.
your not getting treated equally by your parents, teachers, or anyone older than you, so stop fucking trying.
oh sure, tv tells you otherwise, that your parents genuinely give two shits about what you want for dinner, or that you have a say in familial issues. if your parents are doing either of these, here
see her? she's a stripper. DAS WERE YOU GOIN, HOMES.
I know what your saying "Gecko, your not right, My mom and dad are my friends" yeah well, guess what? then your gonna be a stripper or a ho, either or. Parents who tell your friends to call them their first name, take you and your friends shopping all the time, and try to act like their 16 too. if your a parent like that, your a horrible person, and I want you to stop reading now. why? because its obvious your already too stupid to function. OOOH SNAP! YOU'VE JUST ENTERED...
TIERRA DEL FUEGO!
Listen, I don't have anything against strippers, but christ, american parents, its not OUR job to make the strippers. strippers are like good vodka or communist ideals, they're best imported from russia, not unlike blog hero Mikhail prokhorov. russian girls need stripping more than american girls, after all, if your stupid and american, you usually just end up on a reality show or married to some fuckweed limpdick lawyer whose cheating on you with some equally useless human being. the immortal chris rock says as a dad, your job is to keep your daughter off the pole, and this 100 percent true. if your daughters a stripper, you should be branded with a "I suck at every facet of parenting, don't take my advice at all, ok? thank you, I'll just be here whacking off to my lesbian dog porn and sniffing my own feet".
anyway teenage girls, please stop treating your parents like shit "Ohmygod! you don't understand, gecko, they don't let me do whatever I want" yeah, no shit, thats cause thats great parenting. if they did that, you'd end up like poor destiny up there, grinding for creepy old men and talking about how you want to one day open up a make up counter at the mall and meet mister right. guess where mister right doesn't go? strip clubs. anyway, my point here is if you expect your folks to just let you do whatever and treat you like an equal, enjoy a life of disappointment and dickbreath.
Happy veterans day, and god bless this beautiful country:
Kwanzaa Gecko AKA Kwan-gizzle AKA the Big KG AKA gecksy AKA your future stepdad.
